The RedLeaf Fitness Podcast

Anything is Possible: Coach Sean's Journey to Becoming an Ironman

Sean Blinch Season 1 Episode 82

Join me as I open up about my journey from competing in an Olympic distance triathlon to facing the most difficult mental and physical test of my life:  becoming an Ironman.

🧠 This episode and more are available now on all streaming platforms. Check it out on Spotify, iTunes or http://podcast.redleaf.fit/

'𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐑𝐞𝐝𝐋𝐞𝐚𝐟 𝐅𝐢𝐭𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐏𝐨𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐝𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬, 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡𝐲, 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞.

#Strength #Adventure #Community

Speaker 1:

Welcome back to another edition of the Red Leaf Fitness podcast, A show dedicated to bringing you stories, interviews and conversations about living a healthy, resilient and productive life. I'm your host, Sean Blinch, and I want to thank you for making time to listen to this episode today and, if you like what we're putting down, we would love it if you would follow, rate and share this podcast. Alright, now let's get down to business. Welcome back to the Red Leaf Fitness podcast on Wednesday, August 23. Sitting here with Michelle, how are you doing?

Speaker 2:

Good, how are you?

Speaker 1:

Good Today's episode. We are going to go through a race report for the Ironman Montreux Blanc and I am going to give you my honest report through my very tired body and mind at the moment, and we're like three days out and I'm still pretty exhausted.

Speaker 2:

Is your brain tired?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, for sure, for sure. Like if you look at my, if you look at my Garmin health stats, it's non-optimal.

Speaker 2:

Is it even registering a body battery?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, finally, yeah, finally registering a pulse, yeah, yeah, but I'm definitely tired so I'm going to. I'll do my best to recap. So the way we were going to organize this was just try to go maybe not in perfect sequential timeline but, we'll do our best to go through it and see if we can glean out anything that might be helpful for folks. So, yeah, what do you want to start?

Speaker 2:

Let's start before race day, so maybe Friday, saturday.

Speaker 1:

Sure, you know what I just realized? Why don't I start a year ago? Okay, because, and then really briefly, like lead up to why the fuck this thing? Even happened.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I think the context is important.

Speaker 1:

Okay, yeah. So this all started with, like everybody going through a pretty low, horrible time during COVID. And being a business owner is not easy Nobody, you know that's not new to anybody, but definitely being business owners through COVID was.

Speaker 2:

A ride.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it was something that now you and I take deep pride in, certainly something I don't ever wish to repeat, nor do I wish it upon anyone else, and we're you know, we're through it and we've recovered, and now I look back on it and I'm quite proud of our ability to band together with our community and really rely on one another to to get through it, and so it has a is a very special place in my heart because of that. But it left. I was feeling pretty empty and I needed something, and the exact details are a little foggy, but I know that Daniel Lezor challenged me to do an Olympic distance triathlon in Gravenhurst in 2022. And he challenged me to do that in like 2021. And I think this is the way it went and people have to correct my details if I'm fudging this up, but it was. It was he had done it. He said you know you should do it. You won't.

Speaker 2:

Cause you probably said yeah, no, yeah, that's great, no you won't. It was, it was crazy, right it was preposterous.

Speaker 1:

It was, you know. It was just such a departure from like what I, what I know and love, which is actually CrossFit, and I actually I was never a good runner, but I was loved running and I was getting into cycling and because of Karen Burke and and the Cervelo group, when they were stationed up the street, so it was like it was like a perfect storm of how it all you know. But Daniel was definitely the spark in. So he said you know, he challenged, and then I'm pretty sure Jeff, daniel and I were all in the gym at the same time or something.

Speaker 1:

And I said and I said to Jeff, I said okay, jeff, we're doing this triathlon. And Jeff was like, yeah, okay. And then I don't think Daniel was planning to do it. And I said you know, hey, me and Jeff are doing it. If you think your ass isn't doing it, you know you got another thing coming here. And then it was just sort of this ridiculous joke almost at you know. And and then next thing I know I was like I was, I was committed, it was dialed in and through the training I, you know, I hired a coach and through the training I really started to fall in love with it and it started to. It did something really really unexpected and special for me that I want to talk about a little bit. That just hasn't gone away. So I know I said I would be brief.

Speaker 2:

This one's not going to be brief but it is snack people.

Speaker 1:

So we go and do that. That first Graven was triathlon and I have never been that scared in my entire life but simultaneously never wanted to be right there on that boat smelling that Lake air, feeling that sun, but jump into that cold Lake what the fuck am I doing and why do I want?

Speaker 1:

why? Why am I here for this? Why do I love this? It was all it was like this convergence and the most wild emotions, and it was. It was just, it was a spectacular. And then, so you know, I hit the swim, I hit the bike and hit the run, but the but the most life-changing moment and I you know I know people have heard this before, but I really do believe that when I jumped off that boat, I jumped off as one version of myself and I climbed up that pier as a whole completely other, different version, and I've never looked back and that's the context that I wanted to talk about. So you know that comes off the back of again as a. We doubled the amount of people that did the Graven Hurst triathlon in 2020, like this summer. We shot a documentary on it and that's going to come out and communities going to be stoked because it's gorgeous.

Speaker 2:

It's amazing yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's stunning, it's. I got a micro documentary. It's like 14 minutes long, but it's. It's beautiful and everybody who's featured in it is just like just a rock star.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it tells everyone's like individual story, you know, and what everybody got out of it and loved about it and was scared about. And you get. You get to hear people's like their why, well, what? So? What was the leap then? From like an Olympic to an Ironman, like it's a big?

Speaker 1:

yeah, so you know. So I fell in love with uh, in 2020, good question, so in in 2020, I just I fell in love with it. I did that triathlon. I said, I said this this is who I am now.

Speaker 2:

Can I ask you a?

Speaker 1:

question yeah.

Speaker 2:

You say it in the documentary, but it's like um, like who you become along the way. Yeah. Can you explain that Cause I don't know if everybody understands. It's hard to understand that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so that's the first question. So the so you asked like what was the leap between like how did I get from um, from Gravenhurst to?

Speaker 1:

one to do Ironman, because that's like, while while they're the same thing one well the same thing, they're not the same thing. So, uh, I I don't know I just I felt, I felt something I've never felt in a long time and I just I just wanted more of it. So I, uh, I went and did uh a long course triathlon in in Welland, which just is um, just a slightly longer than the Olympic. Um, that one went well. And then I did one with you at the end of the summer, uh in Wasega, which you guys are about to do this Saturday, um, funny enough. So I'll have to do a race report on that one um with Jay Brown.

Speaker 1:

shout out Jay Brown, adam Marmalade um Jeffrey and and yeah, so that's a good squad going in.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, and then yeah, and then I just at that point I was like, okay, this, I love this. Uh, I've really found something here and I'm finding myself and I just I want more of this. So I took that challenge and they said, okay, well, what else? And then, uh, I planned, I set out a race calendar to do. I needed to improve my running, I needed to improve my swimming. So I set out a goal to um in 2023 to do, uh, the Gravenhurst 70.3, which got canceled, which made uh this past weekend so much more sweet Uh, and to do a full Ironman, which, by the way, people do, people definitely do, uh, but it's still crazy, yeah. So it it takes a really long time to get prepared and get ready. So it took, it took over a year to get ready for it and there's a ton of sacrifice that goes into it.

Speaker 1:

So it's not just me, it was my family, uh, it was, uh, you guys here, it was my clients. It was like so every everybody was like doing it with me, um, which is incredibly humbling because, um, you think at times like why the hell do people care about this? Um, but you go through it and uh, so that was, that was the leap, so that I fell in love with it and it just I loved how it made me feel I haven't felt that in a really long time and I just wanted more of it. And I set out on this goal uh to um, to become an Ironman.

Speaker 2:

It's crazy.

Speaker 1:

And so what was your second question?

Speaker 2:

What do you say it off in that, like you fell in love with the process. Yeah. Or you keep falling in love with the process, Like yeah, can you just? Explain that.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, okay, um this one's this one's really honest, so okay. Um, I don't mind talking about this with people one on one or on bike rides or something or with you or um, but to put it out there and tell everybody.

Speaker 1:

So I spend, uh, the lion's share of my time, um, running Red Leap with you, really critical of myself, and uh, it's pretty rare when I get home at the end of the day and I'm really proud of um, of myself, and that's different from being proud of Red Leap in the, in the community, which I am, and I'm proud of you and I'm proud of our team Um, but I rarely feel proud of myself from a career standpoint.

Speaker 1:

Uh, I have definite sources of pride, uh, in my um, you know, in my personal life, with my family and stuff, um, uh, and and in other areas. But from a career standpoint, I, uh, I'm really critical and I'm really hard on myself, uh, and you know it's, it's like you know, you know you're like, you know you're like, you know you, you be easy, uh, be hard on yourself and easy on others. Well, I started to take that to a different level and it's, it's not great Um, and I can work on that and I am trying to work on that, but so that's, that's part of who I am on the inside and uh, when I'm on my bike, when I'm in the water, uh. When I hear the rhythm of my feet while I run, it's uncut, pure time where I feel proud of myself.

Speaker 1:

I guess people can't see, but and I don't, I don't feel that, uh, as much. And so, to have, you know, a swim where I'm, you know, I'm, I'm in a flow state and I'm, I'm, I'm counting my breaths, I'm counting my strokes and thinking about the cues that my coaches have given me. Things are starting to work, uh it and I'm, I'm a thousand miles away from earth, while also being right there, present in that moment. I'm proud of myself. And on the bike, uh, when I'm tucked in arrow or I'm hammering up a hill, and when I get to the end of a bike, I'm proud. And when I, when I, um, when I finish a run and it's an enormous distance that 17 year old Sean or 16 year old Sean would have never dreamed of, or let alone 22 year old Sean, 27 year old Sean, um, so, so that's why I do triathlon, because it's the, it's the one of the very few times, um, when I'm not, um, super self critical of myself.

Speaker 2:

It's not about the race, no.

Speaker 1:

No, it's it. Yeah, it's like. It's like standing in the sun for 15 minutes. It just changes you, Right. And it changes who I am. It makes me better and it I really believe. When I step off my bike and I walk into my house, um, I'm a better father. Um, when I, when I walk in here on a Monday, uh, after like great training, I'm a, I'm the best coach. And and not only am I those things, but I'm the closest version, uh, to who I really want to be. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So, good question.

Speaker 2:

I mean we can just end the podcast there. But I think it's important for people to to understand that because it's so iron man is so big, you know it's like it's even doing some small aspects of it, Like you can understand how, like in theory, how big it is, but it's astronomical. When you're they are watching it, you know and you or you think about, fuck, someone's going to, he's going to do a, he's going to start a marathon now, Like it's enormous, Right. So I think it's interesting to hear, or to understand, what helps propel someone to to be able to sustain that kind of thing.

Speaker 1:

It's a beast. Yeah, it's a beast, and it does take a year to get ready.

Speaker 2:

For sure.

Speaker 1:

For sure. Mm, hmm, so what did you? Want to. How did you want to go through it? Did you want to? Um, do you want me to go? Yeah, paint the picture of like the weekend.

Speaker 2:

So the day before. Yeah, so the day before, okay.

Speaker 1:

So, um we, I was very blessed to have the best race crew, uh, who, like it, was a great mix of um Karen, who had the experience of Iron man. She has eight years of highly competitive triathlon in.

Speaker 2:

Iron.

Speaker 1:

Man, yeah, she's done multiple times in the last couple of years. She's done multiple distances uh, full and half. Uh, she's been to the world championship, um, she qualified for Boston. She has gone to um, I think it's called Lanzarote training camp, and so it was invaluable to have somebody. There was just so many steps to the race that were wildly overwhelming and hard to keep track of them all, but she knew them, and the three of us like yourself, me and Jeff were just sitting there being like, wow, okay, here we go.

Speaker 2:

It was like amazing because Karen keeps those things close right, like she's so supportive of other people, but she's really she keeps things of herself close and just just like I swear to God, it was like a light switch went on. We walked down the basement, into the basement where you guys were setting up your stuff, and I was like this is a Karen. I have not seen it. And it was fucking amazing. Yeah, karen's amazing in so many ways. And that version like coach Karen organizing your stuff, that was amazing.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so that was amazing, and so to have you there. You and I are like you know, we're a single cell organism. We're one person, you know. We share a cell wall. Yeah. So to have you there was so special, and to have Jeff there, he's just like you know. He brings a level of like, care and intensity that is just both quiet, stoic, yet loud. You know, I'll talk later a little bit about how the only way I could have found you guys was Jeff. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Jeff's voice over the crowd, like you know. So we rented a cottage just outside of Tromblon in a beautiful chalet that was across the street from this lake, which allowed us to go out and do like morning swims and everything, and so that was great for a mental prep. It got me. I felt really confident after the two swims that we did. It allowed us to cook home cooked meals and not eating you know restaurant shit like I did when I was there for the 70.3 that were actually happening, but I was eating way more nutritious. He was home cooked stuff, stuff that we all brought from home, and I was able to stay connected to my family with multiple FaceTime calls, which is really, really important the things that keep you grounded. Val had recorded, or asked my, or, yeah, organized to have my family all record personal video messages. Come on.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and that was the first thing that I watched on the race morning.

Speaker 2:

Really yeah.

Speaker 1:

It was. I couldn't believe it, like you know. So you know her message was so sincere and so loving and sweet. And then to see my kids, little bears like, just crawling all over each other just saying the stuff, and then you know, my dad and my brother and it was just, it was amazing.

Speaker 1:

That's amazing my brothers and, you know, my sister-in-law and my mother-in-law like they were just and my mom and it was so special. It was like exactly what you'd want, val. Yeah, it was a wonderful gift and like, and I felt like I slept reasonably well, like if you look at my Garmin, it registers as shit. But I mean like you're gonna sleep shitty anyways, but it's like how good was that shitty sleep?

Speaker 1:

And like it was as good as it possibly could have been. So then we did some race course prep. We actually went to the course, we were on the bikes, we were able to do some of that. That was cool, that was really helpful for me to visualize.

Speaker 1:

I had no idea what that was gonna be like. The only thing we didn't do was flip out onto the highway, which was pretty wild. And then, and the next thing we knew, it was race day. And then we all got up early as hell and went down, you know, under the moonlight, got everything all set up.

Speaker 2:

Like early as hell for people to understand. We were about 25 minutes away from Trombone. We had to be there at 4.30 in the morning, so it's so properly early.

Speaker 1:

Yeah. So yeah, we got there and we got it all set up. And you know, you had you've done. You did a are such a good job on our social media, just following along.

Speaker 2:

I did. And you I did, you did. I did.

Speaker 1:

You know you were asking me things like are you nervous? And I didn't. I never once felt nervous.

Speaker 2:

Really Mm-hmm At all.

Speaker 1:

No.

Speaker 2:

Okay.

Speaker 1:

When you train for something like this. It's one of the benefits of picture this you're getting ready for a math test in school and you actually study for it, okay.

Speaker 2:

So can't really eat, but I intellectually I understand. Yes, that's the way I look at it.

Speaker 1:

So I have, I knew, Are you so prepared I?

Speaker 2:

know what the test is Right.

Speaker 1:

So I'm studying open book all year long and that studying is a blast, right. So you know. So you know ahead of time what your times are going to be. Mm-hmm. So there's no, because sometimes I think what happens is, you know, what drives a lot of anxiety and fear and nervousness and stuff is this fear of the unknown, right?

Speaker 1:

And so you don't really have a ton of that unknown because, while I have never been on the course before and I've never done a friggin' Iron man before, I had a very good idea how all those pieces felt individual of themselves.

Speaker 2:

Right, okay, that makes sense yeah.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, I wasn't nervous. Yeah, I wasn't nervous at all, but I think that was a big piece of it. Just the love and support of my Red Leaf community and everybody around me just insulated me. I felt like everybody was doing it with me, you know. I know nobody crossed his finish lines in isolation and you guys were just amazing. Like I wish everybody could have a race crew like you guys to be there for my first race. I was very lucky to have you guys.

Speaker 2:

It was awesome. We were all so happy to be there.

Speaker 1:

It was fun seeing you guys enjoy it.

Speaker 2:

It was so much fun. Yeah, and for context folks, Karen was 10 out of 10 nervous. She wasn't lying. If you saw that video when we were walking in at 4.30 in the morning, Karen was as nervous as if she was doing it, having never done one or prepared or been on a bike before. That's about how nervous she was. Well, you know, I sort of understood a lot of that because, as she she's the only one of the four of us who knew how you were gonna feel.

Speaker 1:

Exactly.

Speaker 2:

So she knows what you're looking down the pipe at for hour seven and hour 10. Yeah. Right, jeff and I didn't know we were like pigs and shit. We were so excited for you. You're excited because you're ready to go and Karen knew.

Speaker 1:

It's like she all along knew how bad this was gonna be for me. And because I was so naive, I was like, yeah, I'm ready and stoked and pumped, I'm not nervous, and you know. And so that's one of those amazing things about being human is we have this incredible naivety going into things, and if we didn't have that, we wouldn't do half the fucking crazy shit that we do. And then what makes that phenomenon even better is, then we have an amnesia.

Speaker 2:

You forget it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you know, if you were to, I didn't wanna do another Iron man immediately after it took me at least 10 minutes to be like yeah, Definitely wanna do that again.

Speaker 2:

Like a whole 10 minutes.

Speaker 1:

I remember having a conversation with this fuck on the run and him and I were so crusty about what we were doing. He was an American guy and he was like we were. Just I was asked him how many Iron Man's he did. He's like he's like I've done 40s. I don't know why. I fucking do them. I hate them. I hate these. I'm not doing this again.

Speaker 2:

Did you ask him if he said that every single time?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's sound bitch said, for I'm sure he's laughing now.

Speaker 2:

He was like him and I were like he probably signed up for his next one already.

Speaker 1:

For sure he was because, yeah, cause. I told him I was like yeah, I'm doing like Placid, but he had done before and he said it was much harder than Trombla.

Speaker 2:

And yeah, that's nice.

Speaker 1:

Yeah. And I said, you know? I said hey, I'm signed up for it already. And he's like, yeah, I don't know if I'm done, I was going to do this and then decide if I was going to do that one. It's all laugh if I see his ass. I mean him and I are the same age, kind of same build, so if I see him there that's going to be funny. And this time I'll make sure to get his contact and his name is checked. But he was a funny dude. We battled a bit on the run. Ultimately he beat me but yeah, yeah, I got ahead of him on the first 10K. And then I was coming out of the porta potty and he was like, oh, do you have a poop? And I was like, no man, he's called us the worst.

Speaker 1:

I was like no, thankfully he's. And then I got ahead of him again and he was funny, he's like oh, you again, you didn't have to wait up for me. And I was like, believe me, I wasn't, he was cool guy. So do you want to? What should we do Do?

Speaker 2:

you want to talk about. I think you should go through the swim. Okay, go through it.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so we can start at the beginning. So you line up with your swim finishing time, so you go behind the pros. The pros kick off at six AM and the race announcer does a wonderful job of getting everybody hyped up, both in French and in English, and it's pretty cool.

Speaker 2:

It's amazing.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and there's all this clouds that roll in over the mountains and as the sun rises. It's this really cinematic feeling. But again, I wasn't nervous not an ounce of nervousness, because for me that water is a healing place and when I hit that water I was healing the whole time and I ended up having the swim of my life and I could have gone harder. I swam hard and I remember telling you, when I was getting out of the lake near our Shelly, I was like I was like I feel really good, I have so much capacity and depth with my swim and I'm gonna push it tomorrow and I did and I'm so glad I did.

Speaker 2:

But yeah, I yeah, you came out like over 15 minutes earlier. We got the notice on our phone. Jeff and Karen were following you and we're like did they fuck this up? Like this is 15 minutes, well, more than that. I don't remember the exact. It was like 127 or something. We're like holy shit, he's out of the water.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you know, and that's not a blazing fast time, but for a 230 pound newbie that's a time. So I was so happy with that. So that felt really good. And each sport puts you at a deficit for the next one, but if you can go into it with a bit of mental fortitude and feeling good, nothing can. You're feeling strong. So that was cool. I was having fun immediately, immediately.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you could tell. When you came running past this, we were like oh, he's in a good spot, yeah.

Speaker 1:

And how you can imagine it right, Like the bike is where I'm the strongest.

Speaker 2:

And you just crushed your swim. Yeah, you imagine I'm like hey, I got this. Fucking winning this thing.

Speaker 1:

Yeah so.

Speaker 2:

And for everyone who saw the Instagram. This was the point where it was wait, wait, wait, sprint for the spectators.

Speaker 1:

That video was hilarious, you guys.

Speaker 2:

Full sprint yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah. So yeah, go and hit the transition. That's a pretty wild experience. You get into the changing tent and I'll just be real crass and honest. There's a lot of fucking naked dudes, not you know whatever. But I just wasn't expecting that. I don't know what. I think I was expecting everybody to have their own little private, little changing area. I thought it was gonna be way more organized. No, you're just. It's just fucking balls everywhere and Vaseline, oh my God. That might sound a lot more erotic than no, it's not erotic.

Speaker 1:

No, no, just meaning like why are those two things happening at an Iron Man's? Let me explain.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, explain. Yeah, but don't worry, it's not erotic. No, not erotic not like that.

Speaker 1:

Not like that's a sexy thing, I just mean Right, it's like.

Speaker 2:

Go ahead and explain it, vaseline, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so there's a lot of chafing that goes on. So what you do before you get on the bike or the run, there's a lot of body glide, vaseline or the stuff called chamois butter that people. And yeah, it's just like that's a Before you go on a ride or something. That's a pretty private experience you do in your bathroom, you know.

Speaker 2:

Not with 500 of your newest best friends.

Speaker 1:

Wow, I just, I was like and it was like hot in there, so yeah, so I just, so what'd you do? So I just take my tube of chamois butter and I just I just open my Because I'm in a trisuit luckily I don't have to change and I just squirt it down there both sides and then I just administer on the outer side of the garment.

Speaker 2:

Yes, which is not the way. Yeah, right.

Speaker 1:

But in my earnestness to get the fuck out of fucking hot of Vaseline Ballsland, I put way too much. Way too much.

Speaker 2:

I can't stop thinking about Jeff moving your bike.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, we'll discuss that. So yeah, you know and like look, I'm not the squirmyest person. I can handle nudity and whatever and be mature, but I just wouldn't. I wasn't expecting it.

Speaker 2:

Fair yeah.

Speaker 1:

You know. So, yeah, I don't know why I just I was like, oh, you're getting a transition. It's this peaceful, serene thing. Everyone's gonna just be like trying to calm down. No, it was chaos in there, absolutely chaos, so yeah. So I put way too much chamois butter and it was like oozing all outside of my shorts and stuff, which is not cool, and I ended up dripping down, got all over my bike over six hours and then later on, jeff had the wonderful, wonderful experience of having to put my bike back into his car and I mean fortunately- he didn't know, he didn't find out that nugget until we got back to the conno and you explained that story and he's like wait a second. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Is that what was on the bike? Seat yeah. Is that what's currently still on my hand?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so, yeah, that's well above and beyond for Jeffrey and, as you know, I issued him a solid IOU cashable at any moment.

Speaker 2:

Anytime.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you know that's a solid, so okay, so let's get on with it. So I get off the, I get out of the transition area and I'm on the bike. I'm feeling great, like I looked. I'm feeling a bit like, you know, foggy brain. That's why I looked at you guys and I was like, do I look like I have everything? Because I didn't know if I was like going to get on my bike and not have a helmet on or something. So and you guys are like, yeah, great. So and I hop on the bike and I go and it's a blast and I'm riding through movie and there's there are moments where there's there's like rushing whitewater rapids and deers.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's stunning there.

Speaker 1:

And just gorgeousness. And then you ride by a farm for some reason and there's just cows and it's just absolutely gorgeous and the vibe of the of the athletes and the participants were amazing and the all the volunteers were so great. You feel like a pro because you're, you ride by the aid stations and everyone's just so excited to give you a bottle of Gatorade or whatever it is and you ride by and you grab that and it's such a cool thing. I'm like, yeah, look at this, I need this. So the first 90 kilometers of the bike I played my hand really well, it was really great.

Speaker 1:

And at the, at the 85 or 80 kilometer mark, you hit a set of punchy hills that grind you down. Oh my God, they are technical, they are windy. If you don't, if you're, if you get stuck in the wrong gear you don't want to be changing gears going up a nine degree grade so you're up out of the saddle, which is super inefficient to just punch out over the top and get over. But it was good. I was. You know, I was racing dudes and people were not happy seeing Shrek.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, cause you're big on a bike.

Speaker 1:

I'm huge.

Speaker 2:

These dudes are. They're small.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, um, there was a particular couple of guys that were not happy about what I was doing I bet and I was there for it. I was like, let's you know, so we were definitely racing and battling and uh, and then so we come around, and so you had to do that in 90 kilometer bike twice, which is a six hour total ride.

Speaker 2:

If people are wondering, so so you know you're looking down at having to do that section again.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, uh, which I was not prepared for. I did not train that level of intensity at that state. Like I've done, I do a hundred kilometer rides 120 is 100, but to be able to do, to be able to save something, to have the same save matches at at at 170 kilometers not something I trained for, right. So, um, that was a learning experience. But what, what? Probably my biggest mistake of the ride was at the halfway point on the bike. You're supposed to stop and get off and you have, um, something called a personal needs bag and if you think about the day, it's a 14 hour race, but really like it's the time before and after. Think about how hungry you get. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Not exercising. So you really have to replace calories and you really had to replace fuel and stuff. And and I hit the halfway point on the bike and I got to the personal needs area and there was such chaos. The bags weren't organized, people were getting frustrated and irate. It would have set me off 20 to 30 minutes.

Speaker 2:

Like you, would have had to wait 20 to 30.

Speaker 1:

Probably. For someone to get your bag and yeah, then for me to mix my protein shake and figure myself out, but anyways, I should have stopped.

Speaker 2:

Should you have. Would you have been better off to accept that 20 minute wait over the course of that 14 hour day? Yeah, Okay.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so that was a big learning and that that's. That was great. That's what I'm there to do.

Speaker 2:

You can't learn that shit in training.

Speaker 1:

No, no, nor. Nor if somebody, if a coach, had said, hey, do this, would it have meant as much. So, um, I, I don't know why Like I, sometimes I feel like the um, the, the lead role in the world's darkest comedy, where I always have to learn things the hard way. Things don't come easy for me. You know, I, I was born out of a hammer and all.

Speaker 1:

And all I can do is smash Um, so I know that about myself and uh, unfortunately, I tend to always learn things the hard way. So that was a hard lesson to learn, um, but a really good one nonetheless. So I get on to the rest of the, the 90 kilometer mark, or the rest of the of the bike, and, uh, everything's going great. There's one section um which I dedicated to Trent. Um, my, my rider die riding buddy. Uh, who would be just? He would have like such joy to hear that I reached 76 kilometers an hour down.

Speaker 1:

There's nothing. Him and I like better than racing down Warden Hill in Stoke and out in Markham, Uh, and normally, uh, his bike might have a bit more gears in mine, but, um, I can't, I can't go faster than 65. So to go 76 down this hill, I was like that is so fast. It's so fast and it's so fun. I just had a smile plastered.

Speaker 2:

Literally all I can think about is how frigging dangerous that is yeah.

Speaker 1:

Well, all I have? I have these exposed shoulders and, like you know, a Senate millimeter thin um lycra suit on.

Speaker 2:

Oh, so safe, Right yeah.

Speaker 1:

No, I'm fucked if I fall and there were crashes that day. So, yeah, so I get back and I get really punished on that second round of the punchy hills and, uh, it's it. It did not set me up well for the run. And so I come in and I see you guys, and that's why I said to you like, hi guys, I'm low but I'm not done. I got more but I'm not, I'm low.

Speaker 2:

So that was some shit.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and that's right, and I was like that was some shit. I Was so glad to be off the bike. So I go and I and I get changed.

Speaker 1:

I don't go into the the Area of the nudity tent yeah, the new, the hot nudity tent, humidity nudity tent. I skipped that all together and I took my time. I put some new socks on, I Caught, I just got my bearings and I started really just thinking about what I was gonna go out and do. And my next big mistake was not having a race plan Like how you were gonna attack the marathon yeah am I gonna run for eight minutes walk for what, what, what am I gonna do, mm-hmm.

Speaker 1:

So I just went out and started having some fun. First 10k was like oh look you, you're just. This is just a Regular training day. Oh no, and that's when the pain came, and you know what does pain mean?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, like what does that mean at that point for you?

Speaker 1:

Pain means your IT band aches, your low back is on fire, your traps and your neck are throbbing. Your Caps are cramping at just total random. You are starting to get a blister on one foot. One of your toes is numb, you are nauseous and you have a headache and you have over 30 kilometers to go mm-hmm, and you know that you need calories, but you've with, you've missed the window.

Speaker 2:

Right, like there's no amount of catch-up now, that's gonna put you in a good spot.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, gels. The thought of a gel is is repulsive and I've been on training runs where I've gulp back a gel and I've been like that's the most delicious gel of our man my life. Feel that immediately. But this was not that I. I would put back a gel and I would retch.

Speaker 2:

I remember you saying like you'd put it, like you'd eat something and Nothing felt, like nothing happened. Yeah, you're force-feeding, but you're not experiencing the benefit of it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, or at least Psychologically, that's what you're thinking, that's what you're telling yourself. You're like that's just more likely to just make me like need to go use the porta potty, and it's not. There's no, that energy is not translating. There's no, there's no blood in my digit, in my gi, to be able to extract anything from that. That's what you're thinking, which is not necessarily true, but that's the way that's. You're at a really low Headspace and so I started. I was like, okay, you got to get on a race plan because you're, you're fucking up like this is not, you're off your plan, because my plan was to do it in five hours and I think I did it in five hours and 40 minutes or something. I'm gonna check. I don't do, no matter what was about that Okay.

Speaker 1:

So, but my goal was to not walk it, and after After the 18, after after about 18, I didn't run much and it was because I couldn't, so then then my hamstrings just started seizing and that's a really scary feeling. So like a calf cramp, you can kind of walk through, but when you get that hamstring, that like that mass of that of the muscle, you're really intimidated by that, yeah, it's scary. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it's really scary and there was no, there was no way. I was not gonna finish that. So I was trying to err on some conservative like, okay, just walk. Just what I was telling myself is that? Okay, if you can walk, you can just like relax your digestive system enough to be able to get in some calories. That work will actually be meaningful. Right and I think that that worked. I was able to when I walk. I was okay that let that blister on your foot just relax a little bit.

Speaker 1:

Let that toe start to get they come back to life. Yeah. So those were the things that I was thinking. And then, leading up to you guys, I was like, okay, well, I can't not walking up to them. So I was like, okay, you can need a bank, some walking so you can run. And then when I ran up to you, I you could tell how bad I was. And I knew you knew because you cut off the video.

Speaker 2:

You were like I don't want people to see this some yeah Well, I didn't know what you were gonna say and some things Don't feel like they need a camera.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, like you could. I could tell that your concern in your face was more like I don't want to be recording, I want to be talking to him. Yeah so, yeah, it was nice to see you guys, and yeah, and then my my heart rate monitor was chafing and I knew it, like I think I was starting to bleed from it, so I pulled it out and then I think Jeff took it.

Speaker 2:

Jeff, like Karen, take it. He was already yeah he was like you're in coach.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that was a gross thing to have to hand to somebody, but yeah, that was it needed to come off.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, but you know, do you remember what you said? No, I started this fucking thing and I'm finishing it.

Speaker 1:

I Don't remember saying that. Well, I remember thinking that, because there was an immense amount of self positive, self-talk and yeah, I Said that a lot in my heads, but no, I actually don't really remember much of that conversation that we had. And then and then, after I ran away from you guys, I went to the personal needs bag at the halfway point of the run and I sat down, I got out of my thin Lulu socks and into these thicker Lulu cottony things, because I was, I was putting so much ice in my tri kit that it was just all running down my leg and All ends up in your shoe. And you're just running in these squish, squish shoes, which makes, which gives you blisters.

Speaker 1:

Yeah so, yeah, I was able to get out of those socks and it was cramping all over the place. A wonderful Race guy, I was asked. I was able to ask him for a chair in French, and he brought me a chair from their personal Back area and stuff so I could sit, and he he came over and chatting with me while I was getting ready and just checking on me making sure I was okay, and I was like, no, I don't, don't need any staff, or like first aid or anything.

Speaker 1:

Yep, and then he, it was great. And then, yeah, and then a couple other people came over to and so that helped me tight, like helped me get my shoe on, and I drank my protein shake and then I had these two really like salty peanut buttery bars that I was like before the race. I was like you're gonna just love these. And I looked at them was like oh, how am I gonna eat this? You know, I don't even now like I look at them and I'm like I don't really want to eat those, but that's that's.

Speaker 1:

I felt like I felt very good After that little five minute break and then and then I got running again and, and I think at 24 was the last time I was I was able to run, so I think at like from 21 to 24 I ran and then, and then from then on it was it was a disaster.

Speaker 2:

Well, what? What happened?

Speaker 1:

Just couldn't stop. I couldn't stop the cramping. My back hurts so much my traps. I felt like I had a fever right. You know that feeling that achy feeling. Imagine having a fever and then having to run over.

Speaker 1:

Half marathon, basically yeah just under a half marathon feeling like that like you have the flu or something, and it was just like how am I gonna fucking do this? But the answer, that question is how am I gonna do this? The thing that was a little bit louder than that was like how am I not gonna do this? There was no way I was walking back into this gym, not an Iron man, and that's it. That's just what it took, and I could have heard more. I was just, I was not Not going to quit. Now I hope, and now Now. That doesn't mean I didn't want to. Oh, I wanted to. I had this weird moment. I remember seeing this, this. I remember seeing there was this. I told you guys about this. There was this ambulance Like this, like gator Golf cart thingy, like off-roading looking ambulance thingy, with this like caught in it, and I, just Joe by me, and I was like I, I want to be in that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

I could just be like laying there and just like you, imagine Shawn, imagine the bliss. Just it'd be over. It'd be over right now.

Speaker 2:

You could just tell them, but again, Like, what are you saying to yourself when that happens, like when shit gets really bad and I don't mean like everyday training bad like when you're in a spot where you're like how, how am I gonna Like, how am I gonna do this? Just what are you saying? Like, what do you In your darkest moments?

Speaker 1:

you need your brightest lights, and so my brightest lights were we're thinking about the people that love me, and it's not just something that I wrote on Instagram or in text messages to people. I really meant it. I thought about every single person that supported me Over and over and over. And I did it. I was doing the. I was doing it with them as a person. Or and I did it, I was doing the. I was doing it with them. I was doing it for them. It was like A bit emotional thinking about it again. But yeah, imagine, imagine you're on this thing and a mirage of somebody you love comes up and You're looking at them and they're actually having a conversation with you. It's kind of like that and and stuff like that would happen, and like I'd be having a conversation with somebody in my head and I'd start running and it would work every time.

Speaker 2:

That's amazing. Yeah. Yeah it's Like you're out there, completely and utterly by yourself. You're surrounded by people, but you're by yourself, but you still get to Like, rely on the people who care about you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and you're pretty grumpy with strangers, you know like when you're, percent when you're.

Speaker 2:

We were grumpy with strangers.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, when you're so Low like that, you don't want to be polite and you don't want it like all that shit's gone you know, like you're not thinking straight. You're just thinking of one thing and that's get me across the finish line. So I can.

Speaker 1:

Not do this. So, yeah, I needed, I needed people. So you want me to finish up the run? Yeah, okay. So I Remember thinking stuff like Sean, when you get to the 30 kilometer mark, that's gonna feel so good because it's gonna mean this I'd get to that 30 kilometer mark and I, it would be meaningless. I'd be like, oh, my god, you have 12 left, like okay, okay. And then your math starts getting messed up and then you're like when I, when I get to this point, I'm only gonna have like seven left. And then I got to that point, it wasn't seven left, it was. It was actually more.

Speaker 1:

You idiot you know so. So that kind of stuff would happen a little bit. But I Remember strategically walking. Oh yeah, here was another thing that would happen. So my race plan every time we come up with a race plan and follow it would go out the window because it would just not work. I ended up having to run 100 or 100 meters, walk 100 meters. That was the only thing that would work, because it was the shortest amount of running that my hamstrings would take before locking out, and Then the hundred meter walk was long enough that that. So I did that Until I got to the 38 kilometer mark. Just before the 38 kilometer mark, I'm taking out my bar, my cliff bar, and I take one bite and my left jaw muscle like the mandible locks. I'm cramping literally everywhere, including my face.

Speaker 2:

You are so fucked that even your face is yeah. Really.

Speaker 1:

So I got this big hunk of crunchy peanut butter cliff bar in my mouth and I can't chew it and I'm breathing through my nose and I'm like this is a real low point. Buddy, you were not thriving, not a thrive. So I'm there, I am, it's like walking and I'm like kneading with my thumb in my jaw muscle. It finally relaxes it, it, it's oh, it's hard to relive all this shit and so, yeah, and it, it. We cramps a couple more times but I ended up eating half the bar and wanting to barf, but whatever, and I talked to I don't know. I looked in my race belt later. I had so many like half eaten bars it was ridiculous had gels and so I but yeah, so, and then I got to 38 and I was like, okay, I'm running, I'm running home to my friends and yeah, I ran that first. That first kilometer felt good.

Speaker 1:

Okay the final three, from 39 to 42, were complete and utter agony. I. I. I just thought, get to that shoot, because that's where the people and the people will cheer you in. And I got. I finally got to that shoot and they run you up through this, this other hotel thing, first before you enter into the, the main village proper. And so I Got in there and I just kept thinking like you need to get away from people, because what like part of this dream was, you wanted to hear your name from the announcer.

Speaker 2:

I was hoping you were gonna not come in around anybody with a clump. Yeah, you can't. There were a few clumps. I was like he can't come in with a clump.

Speaker 1:

So there I am with the final kilometer Racing.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you were like running.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm sprinting as much as a sprint as I can at the 13 hour 50 mark, so, and I'm sprinting to create distance between me and these other people around me and I'm like, oh my god, this just and Finally I created enough distance between me and this woman behind me. And as I'm running up, I I'm looking over to the left and I see you guys, in my heart skips a beat and jumps and relief hits me. But my next thought is don't stop, because you've that's the, the finish line like.

Speaker 1:

But I remember you guys telling me I had a pretty crazy look in my eye and yeah, cuz I was.

Speaker 2:

I was pretty delirious at that point you look delirious, and then there was a moment where it felt like you recognized us and that faded really quick. Yeah, it was like there and then gone. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah yeah, oh, that was so crazy that moment. And then, and then, so yeah, then I kept running and I ran up that ramp and I, just I, even I I have never felt so proud of myself. There's nothing in my entire life that has ever felt like that. From a, from a you know, like.

Speaker 1:

This is not like when my children were born you know like um um, um, from a personal achievement standpoint, I have been chasing something like that for so long Uh, to have finally checked that box was uh, I can't even describe it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, there there's. There's not really even on the spectator side of things, there's not really appropriate words.

Speaker 1:

you know, like I try to articulate to people what it was like to, it's so emotional and like saying you're proud of someone isn't enough and One of the most special things was just how uh bad you guys wanted this for me, and you know, I I don't know if I told you this earlier today, but I think I told somebody um, but I have never felt more loved in my entire life than I did when I crossed that finish line. And then, after you know, reading the messages from people and the things that they were saying, and and you know um.

Speaker 1:

I posted something on our Instagram and you know reading through the comments and my phone didn't stop the whole day.

Speaker 2:

We had to. We actually had to charge it. We went to the pizza shop and charged our phones, like it's. You hear people talk about community and communities, not fucking barbecues. That's community. You know, to have my phone going off all day about people who are literally sitting in Toronto live tracking you for 14 hours. You know, daniel asked me to FaceTime him so he could see you cross the finish line and then when I said I couldn't because I needed to film it, and he's like, don't worry about it, I found the live tracker. It's, yeah, it's hard to describe how close you feel to people, even on the spectator side of things. Like to read some of the messages where people were sending me to relate to you.

Speaker 1:

I've never experienced that in my life and I didn't expect that, I didn't know, I didn't know how. You know, I felt very supported and but I kind of I just didn't want to put this in people's face, like I didn't want to be annoying about it, right, like this is something that was sort of you know for me, and like I definitely, I definitely wanted to do this so I could inspire. But I thought maybe that would just inspire a certain people who probably would have inspired, been inspired by it, but in any ways, no matter who did it, but to see some of the changes and some of the things that have happened are pretty quieting. Yeah, they're, they're pretty humbling. So I, I, I, I come over the, the ramp which I had crossed a thousand times in my mind and training, and it felt so good. I can still hear the thump of my feet running up the rafters or whatever, the, the structure is.

Speaker 1:

And here, here, the bump, bump, bump of my feet coming up over, and and then I run down the ramp and then there's, like these volunteers, and then they, they metal you, and then a medical person comes over and says are you okay? And I look at them.

Speaker 1:

Well, I said I'm okay, I'm just really happy, because I was crying and I pulled myself together and then I went over to the next station where they give you your finisher shirt and then they give you a ticket or something. No, they, they take a ticket out of your race, bib or they give you food or something. Yeah, and then I, and then I went and got like a poutine, and then you go into this recovery tent thing, which is like the last place I wanted to be. I want to be with you guys.

Speaker 1:

I was like get me out of this, you know. And then I went up to the tent and I was like, oh, you guys found me, cause that was my thought. I was like, oh my God, they're not going to find me.

Speaker 2:

And that was our thought. We were like how's he going to find us? And because we have Karen there, she's like Nope, now we run again and we go and get him.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and then I snuck out, snuck out of a flap or whatever, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Karen went up to the tent because we could see you sitting through. We could see you through the tent. Yeah. And then Jeff found a way to get there and then it was pretty obvious we weren't supposed to be there and Karen was having none of that. She went and got you from the tent.

Speaker 1:

So good. And then, yeah, and then it came out, and then we were able to sit there in that little patch of grass and yeah, that was. And then you guys had my PR beer. Yeah, all that was good.

Speaker 2:

We had four.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I only drank half of one.

Speaker 2:

I bet.

Speaker 1:

But it was good and I want one every time so to be able to sit there with you guys. You know that was the finality of it all. We had looked forward to this dumb thing for a year and we planned it all out and it was such a magical weekend and it changed my life and I'm still processing the whole thing. It was amazing. It was like transformative, it was traumatic, it was. You know, they say nothing grows in the comfort zone. I was a hundred kilometers out of it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I bet, and so I feel like it grew and I think it's really informed what I want to do with the rest of my life. I think I knew that going in, but it's uh, it's definitely clearer now, so we did it. You did it.

Speaker 1:

I did it with everybody. That's the way I feel. Can't wait to do it again. So my plan now is I want to do one a year for the next nine years. My ridiculous plan was I wanted to qualify and go to Kona and go to or niece or something like that. You know, going through this that's, that's less important to me so much as it is the personal development and growth.

Speaker 1:

And the real, the real reward is seeing how it affects others and how that can be a vehicle for um, for for what really fulfills me. Right. Uh, if, if I can, if I can continue. I have the competitive stuff is in me. It's, it's inherent.

Speaker 1:

I just so, if, if I, if I end up uh getting into the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the end up uh getting somewhere, that's great, but that's no longer my like secret goal, right, uh, I could, I could care less about competing with um, the best of the world, um, because nothing feels as good as getting messages, uh, from my family about how I've inspired them to do something or from a client who um spontaneously went and did a 10 K. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Um, because he was stoked, um, so that's a big, that's a big divergence from the plan. So I'm going to. I'm going to do nine years, but I'm going to. I'm going to do it for other reasons which just feels so like in line.

Speaker 2:

You know it's what it's what this whole thing is about. So your entire professional life is about How'd you feel after, like when we got back to the cottage, or like the next day.

Speaker 1:

I was delirious. I was still pretty delirious when we got back to the cottage. For sure, um, because when you guys went and go get the the um, the pizza, um, I, um, I, um, I started shivering uncontrollably so I could tell my body was throwing itself into some sort of like, because you know, you shiver, so that it's in. What do you call it? It's an auto, auto, auto. It's an automatic thing that the body does in response to something. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

And Karen went and got me one of those like Like the blanket. Yeah, like a race blanket, which helped, but I was still freezing and then so went back so I could warm up in the car. That really that was really important.

Speaker 1:

Yeah because I had a light, because I got that cold. I had a life near life, ending calf cramp that I was like, oh, this is over. I survived all that shit, only to die right here with this calf cramp. But that too passed, and then you should have seen me getting up. I was a real fucking piece of work. Stand up. Everything was cramping. When standing up as a risk, you're pretty fucked. And then, luckily, we got to the car and you guys got back five minutes after we got there, or something, which was so good because then we could go straight back and we ate pizza. But yeah, I think I felt delirious.

Speaker 1:

I don't think I slept very much that night because I was just living in fear of another life ending cramp and but to describe how I felt after I've just been on such a high, you know I was telling my client before we started this podcast that, like you know, there's there's there's three zones to comfort. So the center, the center core is your comfort zone. Nothing grows there. And then the core, it's the zone. Outside is the stretch zone Some things grow. And then outside is the danger zone, the DZ. That is a lush rainforest landscape where everything grows and the lovely thing about that is you can't stay there, but the gift shop allows you to take things with you and you have souvenirs and you bring that back and you and you, those are forever. You get them forever. And so in the more extreme or the bigger your goal, usually the bigger the gifts at the gift shop. That's quite the metaphor.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so yeah, I've just been feeling really like on a high and very humble about it and just so a bit shy, I don't know. I mean, you know people are. People have been really nice and kind and you feel you feel non deserving of it, Cause it's really sweet.

Speaker 2:

Cause you're you and you feel not deserve it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean, that's just how I feel. I don't know, I just so, but I just, I'm so, I'm just so happy. I'm so happy that we did it and it was just been. It was just such a long road there. There's been a lot of upsets along the way and a lot of hard days, a lot of good days, and to have that weekend that we did was just. You know, I'll never forget it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it was, yeah, it was amazing.

Speaker 1:

There's no doubt that you know what you know. What you and I went through over that weekend is going to inform the rest of our lives and how we're going to how we're going to handle who we are in the fitness space and in the mental health space and in the in the mentorship space, so like it was a powerful weekend. Yeah, it really was.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and so I mean I think you might have some questions but like what, what?

Speaker 2:

well, I will have most of them in, I think.

Speaker 1:

Oh, good, good, Good.

Speaker 2:

Okay, yeah, I feel like every time I like stop and think about it, something new comes to my brain. You know.

Speaker 1:

So what, like, what are your takeaways like, like for you from athletically? Like, what do you want to do? You want to do this, do you want to do?

Speaker 2:

Um, yeah, I had like decided I wanted to do the 70.3 a few months earlier, um, and it was interesting. Like three weeks, two, three weeks ago I was in the middle of like a shit show with school and and work was ramped up. For some it was kind of just a weird week out with work and lots going on, um, and school was a bit out of control and I was like fuck, uh, I don't know, Maybe this isn't the time to do something like that.

Speaker 2:

Um walking in.

Speaker 2:

So Jeff and I got there on Thursday, before you guys did Um, and everything was already set up and everything like the village was all set up, and we ran into the tent to grab to grab something, and I walked back into the car and I was like there's not a fucking chance, I'm not doing this next year, you know, and and every time, like Jeff and I had talked about it when I brought it up to him initially and he was really hesitant, right, because it's it's time, it's consuming, right, um, and school takes a lot of our time already and he sacrifices a lot so that I can do school and in the way that I am Um, and so he was, he was nervous about me just being able to find the time to do that and not too dramatically impact the remaining time that we kind of have together, um, and so we're out for dinner Thursday night before you guys get there, and he goes.

Speaker 2:

We're just, we're just sitting there and shooting the shit about something and he goes I'm doing this race with you next year. And it's just like when he said that, and, and, knowing how Jeff is, you can't really react, otherwise he shuts down. I was like, oh, okay, that's, that's cool. He's like and then we just kind of started planning it and and we'll train together and he'll be infinitely faster than I am, but it's irrelevant, we'll still be able to train together for it. So now it becomes this thing that instead of pulling us away from each other, like our time we get, we get to do it together. I mean, like how it To me right Like.

Speaker 2:

I just yeah, you guys are going to have you know and so and like yeah, and then you start thinking backwards. It's like how grateful are you that your partner is so capable and willing of doing this stuff with you. You know that your entire social network values this kind of stuff, that the people you vacation with want to swim at six in the morning in a lake when it's cold as shit you know it's.

Speaker 2:

it just puts into perspective, I think, the way you've or it did for me anyways this weekend was very much about like feeling so great about how I have decided to shape my life and the people that are in it. You know how being spending 15 hours with Karen, who's relatively new in in our life, in that way, was amazing. You know, I felt like I've known her for 20 years.

Speaker 1:

You know, you reminded me of something. So my one of my clients asked so he goes did you um, like, did you feel so ready? Because, like you, just you crushed your training and you, you had like, um, you just like we're like a plus on all your training? And I said, no, it's funny you mentioned that because, uh, I went into this knowing I was going to have very suboptimal training and that's really important because and you know, I'm I'm glad you reminded me of it because, uh, a lot of times people aren't going to do something because they're not going to have the perfect plan Right. A lot of times, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, there's no way. I'm not going to crush this, so I'm not going to do it at all. Right. Okay, I have a family. The kids are really young.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, they're little.

Speaker 1:

It's a lot Like a lot, a lot.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Uh, a lot of times.

Speaker 2:

Your house is chaos.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, there's so little between four and eight and or nine Uh, it's insane. Uh, at the very end of your day, when you are the most bottomed out, that's when you need the most most patients as a parent. And so, and we also have a unique job where, uh, I have a non-negotiable bedtime of eight PM, which you know people laugh at, but they don't understand that, like, if I have a six AM client, I'm not showing up 50%.

Speaker 2:

That's five, 58. No having not eaten. No not taking care of your stuff.

Speaker 1:

So I'm getting up at three because that's what it takes, because that person deserves the best. Sean yeah.

Speaker 1:

There's a lot of life doesn't give a fuck about what about my non-negotiable bedtime. So there's a ton of times where I'm I'm getting really suboptimal sleep. Uh, here's another thing. A lot of my long training days required me to be out on uh going out and doing uh 10 hour days of of training. No way, yeah, absolutely not. I am not. This is, this has never been and will never be more important than uh letting Val be alone with the kids. Yeah. This is only okay because she loves this for me.

Speaker 2:

Um, so that comes first, that's my priority, that's my commitment Now you're not a single 25 year old guy who can just you have a career and, yeah, family.

Speaker 1:

So the amount of the amount of long prep rides and stuff and training days that were cut is that is a big pile, and so you have to, and the reason why I sale this stuff is that, like, um, you have to commit to something really big. If you're, if you're trying to commit to something very big, you have to commit to it knowing, uh, the results are going to be what they are and uh, I knew I'm I'm only going to be as good as my six hour training days on Saturdays, and that's enough.

Speaker 2:

It has to be enough.

Speaker 1:

Like being on a bike and doing all that training is, is never going to be more important than, uh, you know, seeing, you know, then, drawing dinosaurs with William, or being there when Sadie learned something new, or I'm not missing that Uh. So you know when, when it comes to this whole triathlon and Ironman thing, uh, this uh has always been and will for all, we will forever be about um, improving my life and those around me and, um, when that starts to change as the day, then that I'm not going to do this anymore. So it's really important. So just you know, if, if, if you're thinking about doing something like even an Olympic, it's going to be a massive time commitment, but understand that you are not going to be able to uh approach it with the most quote unquote optimal, it's just not going to happen.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, Think about how many experiences you miss out on because you're waiting for it to be perfect. It's not. It's never going to be so. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, like I'm training. On Monday, my marathon program starts. I'm training for the, the uh TCS marathon in October. Yeah, I'm a. I'm going to have about four weeks of training before that. Um, is that perfect? No, Is it a reason to not do it? Absolutely not. Yeah, yeah, you still go, you still walk up to the bat and take a swing.

Speaker 2:

Well, I think that just goes back to kind of how we open this thing. Like you have to fall in love with the process in whatever the thing is that you're doing. You have to because you're not going to win your first race or your first competition or you're going to fuck it up a lot.

Speaker 2:

You probably won't, in a lot of cases, perform as well as you're capable of, because life just gets in the way chick gets in the way you know. And if you don't do it because of that, well fuck, you're going to miss out on a lot of stuff, sitting on the sideline waiting for things to be perfect.

Speaker 1:

And I look at life gets in the way, because that's life's way of saying hey, I'm more important. Yeah, yeah. Life gets in the way because it's supposed to, and that's a way of saying get the hell off your bike.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, these things have to enhance your life. Yeah. You know they, they're important. They certainly are, and they demand time and respect and training and commitment and all of those things, but they need to enhance your life, yeah, and they need to be tracked from it.

Speaker 1:

That's right.

Speaker 2:

What are we doing here?

Speaker 1:

That's right, um, did I answer all your questions, so you want to?

Speaker 2:

let me just let me check. Oh, there is one, one, important one. Sure. Um.

Speaker 1:

I'm not answering it because they already know it's not that one.

Speaker 2:

We love Dana and Shawna the same.

Speaker 1:

The same.

Speaker 2:

They're. They're different but same, yeah, Um, because of like your role, like you're at red leaf, like this thing has been pretty public kind of from the start. Was there pressure attached to that? Or like how did it feel? Because there's no moment of like, it isn't private. It's some of your reasons for private, for sure. But yeah everybody knew you were going into this thing. You know, is there like was there pressure attached to that? Or is pressure even the right word? Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, I love this question. So, uh, look, I mean, I'm my. My family hates me for saying this all the time, but and now it's become a bit of a caricature of itself. But pressure is a privilege, it is. It's a privilege that I get to have that pressure.

Speaker 1:

Now you know, there are aspects of um being the, the, the leader of a community with you, where there's a bit of an examined life, where it's not always nice Um, but in this case um it that pressure came in the form of matches in my matchbook.

Speaker 2:

Like you used it.

Speaker 1:

I used it. There was, there was, there was tons of pressure, but that pressure was my privilege, because there was not a hope in hell. I was coming home not an iron man. It would have taken. It would have taken a lot. I had way more in me, I had way more in and yeah, so, yeah, that's a really cool question. So, yeah, yeah, it's interesting.

Speaker 2:

It's like how are you going to use the pressure?

Speaker 1:

I love pressure.

Speaker 2:

I you know that's the thing Race day.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, race day is the best. I know. I don't feel nervous, I don't. Yeah, I think yeah, I have a good relationship with, with, uh, nervousness on and pressure on race day and um, but yeah, uh, but that's all part of it. Like, for example, you know, there was a bit of shame when I talked up, uh, my 70.3. It was a lot of talk, you know, I, I, I wasn't shit then. I was, I had never done this, I never, I haven't, I haven't walked the walk yet. I went out there and I had my sword drawn on the beach, ready to go to war, only to have the whistles blow and and have the race just snatched. You know, but I felt a little bit of shame, but with a little bit of reframing and perspective, immediately I was able to say, like, get over yourself. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Um, this is not important when you understand that there are people not very long from here or far from here who have lost their homes. So you don't get to race and you're a little like Rassute Right, you get over it and then you remember that it was never about this day to begin with. Yeah, it was about who I became on my way there.

Speaker 2:

So and you know what's interesting, like I'm going to monkey this up saying it, people. I think I was like, oh, sean, can he can put a positive spin on on things, right, like you, the race got canceled and it's disappointing, but you find the positive in it and but that's true, you know, because it wasn't about the race day. If it was only about the race, yeah, it's wildly disappointing and there's no positive spin out of that because the race was canceled, but it wasn't ever about that in the first place. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So, yeah, you can be positive about it, because for you it's, it's not about the finish line. It's the entire process getting there.

Speaker 1:

And ultimately, like, let's say, worst case scenario happened and it didn't get to finish this one. I try again.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Yeah, you miss out on some experience that you've learned doing the race, but If you want to do anything great, you always risk looking like an idiot.

Speaker 1:

I'm the biggest idiot of them all. I'm so used to looking like an idiot. You know I fail so much, I fuck, I fuck up so much and that's you know. It's kind of what I was alluding to a little bit before, where sometimes I feel like I'm the, I'm the lead role in the world's darkest comedy, where, like I just felt I just nothing works for me, like I always had to work so hard for things, so I'm used to it.

Speaker 2:

And I don't know. I just feel like how unlucky are people where everything just falls into place. How much are you not testing yourself? How much are you not learning about yourself? Those fuckups are where, like the magic, happens. That's where you learn who you are.

Speaker 1:

I read yeah, I really believe that Anybody who really, really achieved something, show me, show me somebody who hasn't achieved the highest peaks of something, or whatever their personal peaks were, that didn't go through hell to get it. And I can tell you right now, I went to hell.

Speaker 2:

Hell is a little stone in your shoe.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oh, let's see we forgot to talk about that. Okay, we should, and then we'll wrap it up because we're an hour and a half Um that told people to get a snack. Yeah, that's so funny. So I had all these. I had, I had all these, like yeah, there's another good one these powerful things.

Speaker 1:

I was like, okay, you're going to write that You're going to tell your race crew and you get back of it and the. I thought this was the funniest shit and I was like we're lying there on the grass and I was like, guys, okay, this is powerful, we're going to go around.

Speaker 2:

Keep in mind we're concerned for Sean's physical safety at this moment.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and I was like, guys, I found hell. And we're like, oh yeah. I was like, yeah, you want to know what hell is. Hell is a little stone in your shoe at kilometer 21 and you're too crampy to get it out.

Speaker 2:

And I said, and nobody laughed and I just looked at you guys. We're all just like fuck you. Are you okay or are you not okay? Can we lead with that?

Speaker 1:

And I was just looking at you guys like that was a lot funnier in my head than that.

Speaker 2:

I've been holding onto that one for 21.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I had that joke of my every 20.

Speaker 2:

And we were just so concerned about you.

Speaker 1:

Wait till they hear this hilarious shit that I got served up.

Speaker 2:

Crickets.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, nothing, oh well, okay, so why don't we wrap it up there? I also want to just have a quick mention that we are relaunching something called Team Red Leaf, and Team Red Leaf is something that we launched in like 2018, or something as a banner for people to compete under and set goals under and for all of us to sort of rally behind, and also as a flag to wave when you cross that finish line. So by no means do you like need to wave the Team Red Leaf flag or banner, but it's there for you if you need it and when you need it, and all that means is we are all going to be supporting each other and we have a list of events that we think are going to be really great posted up on our Instagram. They will continue to be posted on our Instagram. We'll be rallying to get people signed up for things so you can get involved in that journey of self-discovery and feeling that path to becoming the person and searching inside you and finding those things that you never thought were possible.

Speaker 1:

So join Team Red Leaf. All you need to do is sign up for anything you want and you're on the team, so look out for cool Team Red Leaf apparel. You do not need to be competing in something to get it, because race support is part of the team as well. But if you do want to compete, that's great. So we've got a lot of years ahead of us as a community.

Speaker 1:

So I'm excited and I just want to also say thank you to everybody who thought of these, sent me messages, videos. I love you all. I couldn't have done this thing by myself, thank you. Do you want to say bye?

Speaker 2:

No, I want to leave it there. Okay, alright.

Speaker 1:

Thanks, michelle.